EnnEAgram-Based
COACHINg
photograph by Kyle Montgomery
About ME
I was drawn to the enneagram because it combined the fields of a spirituality and psychology in a way that emboldened my intuition. After studying the system, I talked with friends about it and then friends of friends. Soon I started getting referrals and formally began this work.
In addition to being an enneagram-based coach, I am an associate professor of creative writing at Southern Methodist University, a poet, and a novelist. I have an MFA in creative writing from the University of Mississippi and BA in Literature from Harvard College.
I wrote more about how I came to discover the enneagram here.
TESTIMONIALS
“My conversations with Jacob have been consistently profound and eye-opening. He offers complex, layered insights which he communicates on a variety of levels, fluidly bouncing among them. You will never talk to a kinder or smarter person.”
– L.S. Berlin, Germany
“Working with Jacob has been nothing short of transformative for me. What I come home to in our ongoing sessions is my own deep trustworthiness, my knowing, my goodness. I'm pulled out of the trance of habit and pattern and I remember myself. Jacob's depth of understanding and insight in regards to the enneagram are exceptional. And I've never worked with a more adept interpreter of dreams.
Jacob's guidance over the last year and a half has helped me integrate the unmooring death of a difficult parent, while becoming a more grounded and loving parent myself. I'm becoming aware of and working through old patterns that no longer serve me in my most important relationships. If you're ready for a deep investigation of your true self, if you long for compassionate guidance for this difficult moment in our human story, I can't recommend working with Jacob enough.”
– J.B. Portland, OR
“Part channeling, part analysis, and part reading of star charts to some alternate universe, sessions with Jacob are a dreamlike but deeply grounded dive into our histories, our dreams, our ingrained habits and patterns. And if you thought the enneagram was merely a tool for cataloging personality traits, think again. Jacob focuses on the notion of the invited type: What we’re being called into as our fullest, most realized selves. It’s truly revelatory.”
— S.L. Portland, OR
“Jacob Rubin has been immensely helpful and vital in both the spiritual and psychological development I’ve undergone in the year and a half we have been working together. The enneagram, and the ways in which Jacob utilizes it in his practice, provides a framework within which we’ve developed a highly useful and productive idiom. For me it’s almost like a kind of archetypal shorthand, with which we’re able to interrogate my psyche and attempt to remedy its particular impediments. Unlike previous experiences in therapy wherein I found myself wallowing in pathology, Jacob’s approach is deeply perceptive, empathic and dynamic. The model of integration presented by the enneagram, and aided by Jacob’s rigorous and searching knowledge of it, has directed our work in a way I always find stimulating and edifying. He’s particularly adept at dream analysis, and the quality of my interior and subconscious life, as well as the insights I’ve been able to glean from interpreting its psychic material, have improved greatly.”
– D.N. Manhattan, NY
illustration by Nathania Rubin
The Enneagram
The word “enneagram” describes a symbol that has existed since the time of Ancient Greece. The first person to append a theory of psychology to this shape seems to have been a philosopher named Oscar Ichazo, who gave a series of intensive classes on the topic in South America, in the late 1960s. In attendance was a psychiatrist called Claudio Naranjo who would later give his own interpretation of the subject in seminars held at the Esalen Institute. From there, the system was disseminated far and wide, and now appears in many places, with varying degrees of rigor.
If you first encounter the enneagram in the form of an online quiz, you may think, hmmm I don’t know about this. In fact, the view of self modeled by the enneagram is resonant with well-established schools of therapeutic thought, including Internal Family Systems Theory, Jungian psychology, and traditional psychoanalysis. As someone skeptical of personality systems, I was amazed by the power and usefulness of this framework.
Press
Appearance on Slate Culture Gabfest
FAQ
I took a couple of online enneagram tests and got conflicting results. How can I know what my type is?
The online tests are a mixed bag. The enneagram teacher Suzanne Stabile recommends that those who are curious to locate their type read about all nine and see which description resonates most. I think that’s good advice. The best internet write-ups that I know of can be found on the Enneagram Institute’s website. I would start there.
What if after reading about the nine types on the Enneagram Institute website, I am still confused?
The idea of the enneagram is that any one person’s psyche is comprised of all nine types, so it’s probably inevitable that a person will relate to more than one of the numbers. The view of self put forth by the enneagram can be thought of in archeological terms. Because the “home number” is the deepest and most firmly embedded, it may at first be hard to identify.
Can you help me determine what my type is?
Yes. I try to help a person uncover their number in a first session.
How do you know that you are right?
The work I do is interpretative, so there’s no way I can know. The biggest measure of accuracy is whether the session feels helpful.
If I already know my number, is there any point in working with you?
Yes. Learning one’s number is really just the beginning of working with the enneagram.
What are some things clients get from working you?
I try to help my clients clarify their intentions; take relational friction less personally; bring greater awareness to old behavioral patterns; and find guidance in dreams.
What is the “invited type"?
That’s a name used by interpreters of the enneagram for an alien or disparaged part of ourselves that we long to accept.
Have you received any formal training?
No.
How often do you see clients?
As often as twice a week or as infrequently as once a year.
How does what you do differ from therapy?
I attempt to listen compassionately to my clients and to offer guidance, as informed by my understanding of the enneagram. That may or may not differ from the methods of a trained therapist.
Is there any kind of client you won’t work with?
Because I have no formal training, I don’t feel qualified to work with people who are severely depressed, suicidal, bipolar, or who suffer from borderline personality disorder. Visitors to this website experiencing distress of that kind or magnitude should seek help from a certified health professional.
How much does a session cost?
$200. I reserve one sliding-scale spot for a client who can’t afford this fee.
How long is a session?
45 minutes.
Are sessions confidential?
Yes.
Do I need to know anything about the enneagram to work with you?
No.
How are sessions conducted?
Sessions are done over the phone. I prefer phone to Zoom or video chat. If a client wishes to record their session for personal use, I can also meet via Zoom, audio only. For a video chat, I charge an additional $40.
How is payment made?
I ask clients to pay upon booking the session via Venmo or PayPal @theinvitedtype
What is your cancellation policy?
I request 24-hours notice. Failure to give notice will result in a billed session.
Do I need to do anything to prepare for a first session?
I suggest coming to a first session prepared to discuss a life challenge you are trying to work through or make sense of.
Are there books on the enneagram you would recommend?
Yes, definitely. Some recommendations can be found under Other Resources.
SETTING UP A SESSION
To schedule a session, please email theinvitedtype@gmail.com.
Phone and audio-only Zoom sessions are $200. Video sessions are $240.
All sessions are 45 minutes.
Please give 24-hours notice for a cancellation, and pay upon booking, via Venmo or PayPal, @theinvitedtype
More information about sessions can be found under FAQ.
OTHER RESOURCES
The Wisdom of the Enneagram by Don Richard Riso and Russ Hudson
The Spiritual Dimension of the Enneagram by Sandra Maitri
The Enneagram: A Christian Perspective by Richard Rohr and Andreas Ebert
The Path Between Us by Suzanne Stabile
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